Apr 25, 2011 - by Steve Gerweck

Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the WWE Draft. And lets not waste any time because we’re starting with a battle royal that will determine the first two picks!

20-man Battle Royal
2 picks in the draft
We aren’t even given the starting RAW montage or pyro, it’s right into the match! King, Josh Mathews and Michael Cole describe the match as Kane is the first one to be eliminated by a group of RAW wrestlers. Now SmackDown guys is shown trying to get rid of Khali and succeed. Drew McIntyre tries to eliminate Daniel Bryan as Vladmir Kozlov is eliminated. Then Ezekiel Jackson is doubled teamed by Evan Bourne and Mark Henry.

Seamus is looking in trouble as Evan Bourne as Wade Barrett, Heath Slater and Ted DiBiase are eliminated. Then Mark Henry sacrifices himself to eliminate Brodus Clay. Big Show makes quick work of Yoshi Tatsu. Sheamus is thrown over, he saves himself, but then is eliminated as we had to our first commercial.

We’re brought back into the battle royal as 4 competitors each remain. Evan Bourne craftily eliminates Drew McIntyre. Santino tries the Cobra on the Big Show but gets a KO punch for his troubles and an elimination. Then Cody Rhodes is thrown out unceremoniously, followed by Daniel Bryan. Big Show is one left, can Evan Bourne and Mason Ryan get rid of him? Evan and Kofi put on an amazing show on the apron as both NEARLY get eliminated! Evan gets caught by Big Show who throws him out effortlessly. Then Mason Ryan is dumped out after a kick to the head by Kofi.


First Pick in the WWE Draft: SmackDown! selects JOHN CENA

Todd Grisham introduces John Cena as the newest member of SmackDown! Cena hypes up his move way over the top. He says life changes you have to change with it, like Dennis Rodman going from man to woman to man. He hypes his match at Extreme Rules when in comes The Miz, who says after this Sunday as far as RAW goes, Cena is right: he can’t see him, and does his signature wave in front of his face. Michael Cole talks up a match he will have with J.R. tonight.

Josh Mathews then diverts away from Cole and brings up last weeks happenings between R-Truth and John Morrison. Justin Roberts introduces R-Truth, who asks Raleigh, NC, to shut up! He says the crowd should boo themselves and offers to explain the topic today: “you”. Last week, Morrison, who Truth called his friend and pal, through “What” chants, challenged him to a match for his spot. He said Morrison challenged him because of the fans and he accepted because the fans wanted him to. Therefore, he lost because of the fans.

He said he has spent a career trying to please everyone, and it got him nowhere. For 10 years, Truth said he chose the fans. But now, he is officially giving the fans the boot. 10 years of frustration and disappointment, when he let it all go it felt marvelous. He said for the first time the Truth had set him free. Then he is attacked from behind by John Morrison as referees come out to break the fight up. Now magically Cole likes R-Truth…imagine that. Morrison breaks free and goes back after R-Truth.

We are treated to another Kharma doll promo. We are shown her face for the first time. I have to say I can’t wait for her debut.

Eve Torres in the ring as I suppose the second pick from the battle royal got forgotten…oh well. On with the night.

Eve Torres vs. Layla w/ Michelle McCool
Winner gets 1 draft pick
We are treated to the two’s therapy session from this past Friday night as the bell rings. Layla goes right to work. Eve counters with a Downward Spiral for two. Cole interrupts the divas AGAIN! This is SO disrespectful, this causes Layla to lose the match. Cole berates the Divas and calls himself a better athlete.


After the match, LayCool gets in YET another fight, this time with Layla on the offensive.

Second pick in the WWE Draft: RAW selects… REY MYSTERIO! I think we know who Sin Cara is feuding with.

We see J.R. working out building up for his match later tonight.

Cody Rhodes is asked by Todd Grisham his reaction to the draft. Cody says now that the two of them are on different shows, he’ll make sure to give Rey a going away present: a new mask.

Kofi comes out to the ring now, we got another match and another draft pick on the line.

Kofi Kingston vs. Sheamus
Sheamus immediately overpowers Kofi and brings him to the mat. He clubs Kofi’s chest twice and an over the rop shoulder tackle for two. Reverse Chin Lock by Sheamus, Kofi fights up but Sheamus keeps the advantage, Irish whip, Sheamus meets nothing but turnbuckle. Cross Body by Kofi for two. Four top rope punches by Kofi and a clothesline by Sheamus. Sheamus goes for both finishers but then two Troubles in Paradise seals the win for Kofi Kingston!

WINNER: Kofi Kingston

Third Selection of the WWE Draft: SmackDown! selects… RANDY ORTON!

Next: Michael Cole vs. Jim Ross

Cole comes out to the ring with Jack Swagger in his hideous looking singlet. Booker T has joined King and Josh Mathews at ringside. We are forced to relive last week’s “knighting” and J.R. being forced to kiss Cole’s hideous feet. King and J.R.’s match with Cole and Swagger is hyped as the bell rings!

Michael Cole vs. Jim Ross
Cole impersonates J.R. The two circle as Cole keeps disrespecting J.R., who takes a swing. Cole takes J.R.’s hat and wears it, acting like a complete douche, and then stomps on his hat. Cole wastes everyone’s time as J.R. grabs Cole by the straps. Cole demands a timeout (really? come on). Cole tries to lift J.R. and fails miserably. J.R. lets him have it. Cole tries to get away, but then King throws him back in as Swagger attacks King from behind then attacks Swagger. Swagger then applies the ankle lock. Cole has been busted open. Swagger takes J.R.’s belt, hands it to Cole and puts J.R. in the ankle lock again, letting Cole smack him with the belt. King makes the save and throws out Swagger! Cole tries to get away but King gets some good licks in before that happens. In chimes the contemptible anonymous G.M., who says that the Jim Ross/Lawler vs. Cole/Swagger will be a country whipping match!

Cue the Miz and Alex Riley. Miz is clearly envious of The Rock’s birthday celebration next week. Miz says this Sunday, he will find a way to win because thats what he does. He says that everyone should pray he doesn’t get drafted because after one month, RAW will be canceled, guaranteed.

Randy Orton is now in the ring, now representing SmackDown, now ready to face generic C.A.W. #1 I mean Dolph Ziggler.

Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler
Randy starts with a body slam and a knee to the head for two. Dolph gets a neckbreaker for two and then puts Orton in the corner, fireman’s carry. Cover for two. Armbar, Orton fights out with punches, Diggler tries to get it back but is taken outside. Poke to the eye and Orton is taken out to the crowd as Dolph tries to get the count out win for RAW. Orton makes it back quick and a Lou Thesz press. Orton is now on his signature roll. Powerslam followed by an Olympic Slam (lol Kurt Angle). Dolph gets a kick, Randy gets his modified backbreaker and uncoils for the RKO, Vickie distracts, school boy for two. RKO! Seals it for the win! Did I hear Josh Mathews say two picks? Did Vince realize he forgot a pick earlier? Maybe.

Fourth Selection in the WWE Draft: SmackDown’s selection is….put on hold by CM Punk. He talks up his and Orton’s match, a Last man Standing match. He says an RKO won’t get him the win, and that he will send Orton to SmackDown hurt, a shell of what he used to be. Orton says he will miss many things, but what he won’t miss is Punk’s endless rambling. After this Sunday, Punk won’t be talking, walking, eating, drinking, or moving. All he will be doing is sleeping, unconscious sleeping. Because Orton will be…the Last Man Standing.

Fourth Selection in the WWE Draft: SmackDown’s selection is….COMING UP AFTER THIS COMMERCIAL BREAK!

We’re welcomed back to RAW over the break it was determined that SmackDown receives….MARK HENRY and SIN CARA

Another match worth two picks next as Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett makes his way to the ring.

Wade Barrett vs. Rey Mysterio
Wade gets the advantage immediately forcing Rey in the corner, Irish whip, counters with a kick, slides under Barrett, but Barret gets a side slam for two, then punches Rey a few times. Foot on the throat of Rey in the corner. Cover for two. Wade works on Rey’s back. Rey works back to his feet and goes back to those kicks and a flying springboard cross body for two, but then Wade reasserts his authority and puts Rey on the top turnbuckle. Rey tries to fight out of the superplex and does. Hurricanrana… 619!!!!! To the top rope, splash cover for three!

WINNER: Rey Mysterio

Sixth pick in the WWE Draft: RAW selects… THE BIG SHOW

Seventh pick in the WWE Draft: RAW selects… ALBERTO DEL RIO

Alberto is shown backstage. He casts his shirt aside as Brodus asks about his future.

Extreme Rules’s theme is promoted by King. Cole’s face looks hilariously funny as King is laughing at him as the announcers run down the card for Extreme Rules, which is in just six days!

SmackDown GM Teddy Long comes out and proudly announces tonight’s main event: a 6-man tag team match for the last pick.

CM Punk, Alberto Del Rio and The Miz vs. Christian, Mark Henry, and John Cena…it’s next!

We see a trailer for Randy Orton’s new movie “That’s Who I am”. King and Mathews mention that tomorrow the draft continues as a supplemental draft.

6-man tag team match
CM Punk, Alberto Del Rio and The Miz vs. Christian, Mark Henry, and John Cena
Christian and Miz starts it off, Miz gets an advantage though brief. Christian tags in John Cena and Miz wants nothing to do with him.

We are brought back to RAW as Cena gets an advantage over Punk and tags in Mark Henry, who dominates Punk. Tag in to Christian. Christian has a clear advantage until Punk kicks him and goes for GTS. Miss, but his roundhouse kick does not miss. Tag to Del Rio, drop kick cover for two. Del Rio gets an advantage and tags in Miz, who applies a Camel Clutch. Christian fights out but Miz gets him back and isolated. He tags in Punk, hard Irish whip. Tags back to Miz, who taunts Cena. Christian smacks him and attempts the Killswitch but didn’t get it as the Miz clotheslines him for two. Tag to Del Rio who continues to wear Christian down with an arm breaker for two. Armbar applied, but the break is forced. Del rio tries a top rope superplex. Tornado DDT and both men are down! Miz tagged Cena and Cena tries to go for his signature chain but then Mark Henry turns heel! This allowed Miz to nail the Skull Crushing Finale.


Eighth and Final pick for the WWE Draft: RAW Selects… JOHN CENA?!?!?!?!?

John Cena then clears house and no sells everything that happens and dumps Miz out. I can guarantee one thing: people saw Cena drafted to SmackDown….NO ONE saw him being drafted BACK to RAW the same night! What an interesting night! I hope you all enjoyed your night tonight, take care. I will see you back at 8 PM next week covering Tough Enough. This is Hans Keller signing out!

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