Former wrestling manager drops almost 40 pounds

May 3, 2015 - by Steve Gerweck

james mitchell

Former wrestling manager “Father” James Mitchell (Sinister Minister) posted on Facebook:

In approximately three weeks I have dropped from 243 pounds to 207. No Ebola, AIDS, or Methamphetamine. Just readjusting my eating and drinking habits from compulsions to indulgences. I haven’t even made the next step of getting off my lazy ass and exercising.

I always swore I would never count calories or deny myself any pleasure I wanted if I could afford it and it was within my reach. That mindset started turning me into late era Marlon Brando when he bought the Tahitian island and wore a muumuu.

I substituted my beloved triple bourbon and Cokes with a single shot of rum and diet ginger ale. On cheat day I will have no more than five beers if I am REALLY annoyed at karaoke singers. I eliminated all unnecessary bread and, hardest of all, various potato based comfort foods. I do eat lots of yummy melons, and not the kind I am known for.

A recent visit to the Waffle House, purely out of necessity due to time constraints, led me to opine that my dish tasted like Astro-Glide, rock-salt, and sand.

I’m starting to enjoy this healthy living gimmick.

Going forward, I am debating shaving my head, once my face has deflated sufficiently.
Excelsior!

Leave a Reply