12/12/11 WWE Raw Recap (Slammy Awards edition)

* Live from Norfolk, VA

– We start a with a promo video for the Slammy Awards.
– Pyro, followed by Michael Cole welcoming us to the show. At ringside, Cole and Lawler kick off the show.

* First Slammy presentation – “Tell me I didn’t just see that award” presented by Booker T and Hornswoggle. Hornswoggle talked about Booker T winning the IC title Sunday at TLC. Nominees: Jim Ross, Santino, R-Truth, The Rock, The Miz

WINNER: JIM ROSS

Jim Ross, who came out with Eve and Alicia Fox, accepted the award. He said he couldn’t believe he’d win a Slammy for getting jiggy with it. Michael Cole is outraged, and protests in the ring. Booker T said Cole is a sore loser, and said JR could beat Cole in a rap off. Cole said he listens to Enimne, not eat M&M’s like JR. Cole went first, and rapped about beating The King at Wrestlemania, and continually making fun of Ross. Booker said that was the worst rap he has ever heard. JR seemed to making up his lyrics as he rapped, telling Cole he can kiss his ass. Booker T declared JR the winner by crowd reaction. Ross is about to leave the ring, but Booker T said its time for a JR-roni. Booker T’s music played, and Book does a spinaroni, and encouraged him to do. Book encouraged Ross by chanting “JR, JR.” Ross did spin around in the ring, as Cole said this was the worse thing he has ever seen and he continued to hurl insults.

Backstage, Mick Foley is ready to present a Slammy!

* Next Slammy presentation by Mick Foley and Ted DiBiase for the “Holy bleep moment of the year” – nominees: Sheamus, Randy Orton, Big Show and Mark Henry for breaking the ring, and Evan Bourne going air borne off the ladder.

WINNERS: Big Show and Mark Henry.

Big Show accepts for the both of them. He said the award is for being visually spectacular, and would his slammy would look good with the world heavyweight title belt. We see a clip of Big Show-Henry angle from Smackdown, where Show worked over Henry’s ankle, and slamming him with a chair. Big Show said he was going to the ring to be visually spectacular.

(1) The Big Show vs. Wade Barrett. Before the match, Barrett cut a promo on Orton for TLC. Barrett said if Big Show wins the title, he’ll be coming for him next.

commercial break.

After the break, the match is joined in progress. Barrett slams Show in the ring post, and leaves him by a table on the outside. Show recovers and demolishes the table. Big Show delivers a right hand, but Barrett gets disqualified for using a chair at 1:34 after the break.

They plug for later tonight, Henry vs. Cena.

* Next presentation by The Road Dogg Jesse James. Pipe Bomb of the Year – nominees are:

WINNER: CM Punk

CM Punk came out with a mannequin wearing a Dynamic Dudes t-shirt and talked about how boring John Laurinaitis is, and show a highlight of his career. Wow, Shane Douglas seen again on WWE television. Punk accepted a life time award achievement award for him, and impersonated his voice.

– Later tonight, CM Punk and Randy Orton vs. The Miz and Alberto Del Rio. Wow, this show is really lacking thus far.

* Next presenter, Lita. Divaliciious moment of the year – nominees – Natalya, Kelly Kelly, Kharma, Beth Phoenix

WINNER: Kelly Kelly

Kelly Kelly comes out, but followed by Natalya and Beth Phoenix. Beth grabs the slammy from Kelly, but Kelly slaps her and grabs it back.

We see a WWE ’12 match pitting Henry vs. Cena to hype the actual match later on.

* Trending star of the year – presenters, David Otunga and Tony Atlas. Atlas just laughs at Otunga. Bad laughing, geesh. Nominees – Cody Rhodes, Daniel Bryan, Dolph Ziggler, and Zack Ryder – to be decided in a fatal four way match.

(2) Fatal four way match – Zach Ryder vs. IC champion Cody Rhodes vs. Daniel Bryan vs. United States champion Dolph Ziggler (with Vickie Guerrero).

Commercial break.

The first one of the competitors that trends on Twitter wins the Slammy. Yawn. Another commercial break during the match.

Winner: Ziggler via the Zig Zag on Daniel Bryan

Winner of the trending star of the year – Zack Ryder (as presented by Jerry Lawler). Ziggler nails Ryder and the grabs the Slammy.

Tonight’s secret word is dinosaur. Secret word instructions

* Next presenter, Christian, wearing a neck brace, walking boot, and using crutches. Christian awards himself the most courageous award of the year for showing up tonight. Christian wants to know why he isn’t nominated for WWE superstar of the year. He blames the fans for not showing enough outrage for not getting what he deserved, another title shot. Game changer of the year – nominees – HHH and Mr. McMahon, Edge, Kevin Nash, The Rock and John Cena

WINNER: Rock challenges Cena for the main event at Wrestlemania 28.

John Cena comes out to accept. Cena said he isn’t out here to take accept all the credit, and introduces the most electrifying man in sports entertainment, but of course, he isn’t here tonight. Cena said sometimes The Rock speaks via satellite, but tonight, there is no clip from The Rock. He apologizes for Team Bring it, for not bringing it. Cena said he hopes The Rock sees this and charges his preparation for Wrestlemania. Cena said Wrestlemania 28 will be the biggest in Wrestlemania history. Cena and The Rock change the game forever, says Cena.

– Next presenters, Santino and the Bella Twins for the OMG moment of the year – nominees – HHH tombstones The Undertaker, Rock bottom on Cena, Superstars walks out on Triple H, and Punk takes the WWE title and leaves

WINNER: Triple H

Triple H returns with a sledgehammer and spitting water. Hunter heads to the ring seven weeks after being viciously attacked by Kevin Nash to cut a promo. Hunter said the true OMG moment of the year was when Undertaker was unable to leave the ring, and has since disappeared. We see the footage of Nash attacking Hunter on Raw. Hunter tells Nash he should have finished him off when he had the chance. Hunter said on Sunday, he’ll climb to the top of the ladder and use the sledgehammer on Nash. Hunter said on Sunday, Kevin Nash is done. Santino was to give Hunter his Slammy as he walked off, but walked away intimidated.

Ricardo Rodriguez introduces Alberto Del Rio who came out in a 1964 Rolls-Royce.

(3) Alberto Del Rio and The Miz vs. Randy Orton and WWE champion CM Punk. Charles Robinson is the referee. Minutes into the contest, we cause for a commercial break. Back in action, CM Punk is being worked over by Miz and Del Rio, preventing him from tagging in Orton. On the outside, Barrett yanked Orton off the ring. Skull crushing finale by Miz, and the heels win at 12:39.

After the match, Orton goes through the crowd looking for Barrett as the heels celebrated. Del Rio and Miz attack Punk with the chair. Del Rio jumped on the ladder with Punk under it. Del Rio arm locks through the ladder as Miz cuts a promo on him. The heels stand over a wounded Punk.

Punk votes for the WWE superstar of the year on his computer at ring side. He votes for The Miz.

– We see another Kane is returning video.

– We see another promo for the WWE Network.

* Next presenters, Goldust and Vickie Guerrero. A-Lister of the year – nominees – Hugh Jackman, The Muppets, Snooki, and Cee-Lo Green

WINNER: Snooki

Snooki thanked the fans via a pre-recorded message. He wished Zack Ryder luck to the chagrin of Vickie.

– Backstage, Josh Mathews interviewed World Heavyweight champion Mark Henry. Henry tells Big Show he hasn’t seen anything yet, and the title is staying with him. He said Cena disrespected him, and tonight he shouldn’t be worried about Wrestlemania, he should be worried about being inducted into the hall of pain.

(4) Jinder Mahal vs. Sheamus. Mahal said tonight he’ll put in a Slammy award performance, but Sheamus quickly kicks him knocking the mic out of his hand, so not match for these two tonight.

Last chance to vote for the superstar of the year.

* Presenter for WE Superstar of the year – Rey Mysterio Jr. Nominees – Randy Orton, The Miz, CM Punk, Alberto Del Rio, Mark Henry, and John Cena

WINNER: CM Punk

John Laurinaitis comes out, instead of Punk. He said Punk is currently in no condition to accept the award, and accepts it on his behalf.

(5) Non-title match: World Heavyweight Champion Mark Henry vs. John Cena. After the ring introductions, and twenty five seconds into the contest, we take our final commercial break of the evening. Thank heavens! Back from the break, Cole said its been all Henry. Cena recovers for the five knuckle shuffle, but Henry counts with a slam, but could only get a two count. Big bear hug applied by the world champ on Cena, but he was able to maneuver out of it. World’s strongest slam by Henry, but the power goes out, and Kane returns wearing a helmet. He chokeslams Cena, does his arm gestures, and the fire goes off. He pulls off the helmet, and he is wearing a new mask, as the show ends.