1/13 WWE Main Event Report

by Matt Storm

Your announcers for the show are Rich Brennan and Jerry “The King” Lawler

Three 6 Mafia alerts us that Somebody’s gonna get their ass kicked as Mark Henry makes an entrance for a rare opening promo on Main Event. Brennan and King hype him up as one of the biggest obstacles for 29 other men come Royal Rumble time.

Mic in hand, Henry goes over his impressive list of accomplishments he’s accrued in his 20 year tenure with WWE. But for all the destruction he’s caused and all the championships he’s won, he’s never won the Royal Rumble Match. This year will be the year that white whale is attained. As he begins to describe his mighty strength and how it will serve him well on that night, The Ascension rudely interrupt.

Konnor tells Henry that he just might possess The World’s Shortest Memory as it was at last year’s Wrestlemania, he and Viktor eliminated him from the Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal. He might be powerful but he can’t withstand the baddest team on the roster. Viktor promises annihilation but they won’t be waiting for the Rumble; rather they intend to start with him right now.

At that moment, Ascension hit the ring for a two on one beat-down of Henry. Not one to shy away from a fight, Henry fires back but the numbers game is too much for even him. Just as things seem their bleakest, Jack Swagger rushes to the ring and suddenly the feature bout of an edition of Superstars two weeks ago is revisited. Ascension quickly bail but are sure to trash talk as they back up the ramp. Henry and Swagger stand tall in the ring, demanding they return to finish what they started. They’ll have to wait until the feature match later on!

Analysis: A basic segment but something that is sadly too rare in today’s WWE. Interview time for the midcard and some continuity to accompany it. Very refreshing to see here and something that should be a priority of Raw and Smackdown.

1. Fandango vs.Stardust

As Stardust makes an entrance,we’re shown an insert promo as he talked up his chances of winning the Royal Rumble in the usual bizarre fashion.

The action kicks off with a collar&elbow lockup, Stardust positioning himself to apply a side headlock. Fandango pushes him off into the ropes but he rebounds easily to connect with a shoulder tackle. Stardust bounces back off the ropes and Fandango executes a drop down and a leapfrog followed by a nicely placed dropkick. Stardust bails to the floor but there is no reprieve from the Lord of The Dance as Fandango quickly takes him out with a plancha.

When the action returns to the ring, Stardust evades Fandango coming off the ropes and stops him in his tracks with a headbutt to the midsection, then viciously stomps him down onto the mat. Stardust keeps up the onslaught with a kick to the gut before choking Fandango on the middle rope with a foot pressed on the lower back. Fandango’s head is rammed into the top turnbuckle then Stardust backs him against the ropes for some body shots. Stardust gets a 1 count with a bodyslam.

As soon as Fandango kicks out, Stardust traps him in a chinlock. After several minutes of struggling, Fandango fights to his feet but is instantly shut down with a clubbing forearm across the back. Stardust attempts to throw Fandango over the top rope but he manages to land on the apron feet first; from there he attempts a slingshot sunset flip but Stardust sits down and cradles the legs for a nearfall. Fandango leverages Stardust with a traditional sunset flip for a nearfall of his own.

As both men roll to their feet, Fandango traps the arms of Stardust and gets a nearfall off a backslide. Fired up, Fandango connects with an inverted atomic drop followed by a trio of clotheslines. Fandango sends Stardust into the ropes looking for a backdrop, only to receive a kick to the chest as he ducks his head. With sufficient space created, Stardust hits the ropes but is met with a spinning kick for a Fandango nearfall.

Fandango looks to deliver a Falcon’s Arrow but Stardust uses momentum to flip up&over, landing behind him. Stardust goes for the Queen’s Crossbow but it’s reversed and he is sent into the corner. Fandango leave his feet for the charge in but crotches himself in the middle ropes when Stardust moves. Stardust snatches the back of Fandango’s neck and hits the Queen’s Crossbow for the pinfall.

Winner: Stardust

Analysis: Pretty good back&forth opener, particularly the last few minutes. You could make an argument that both men are severely underutilized right now. The problem with Fandango is his act is of the one note variety and without a valet to dance with, he’s left spinning his wheels. Stardust has great charisma and his in-ring work is a solid as ever; they just seem willing to go only so far with him and then he stalls out. He;s doing more to get noticed himself with his ongoing issue with Arrow’s Stephen Amell.

2. Alicia Fox vs. Tamina

On commentary this is pushed as the latest battle between Team Bella and Team B.A.D.

Tamina’s entrance includes the on-air debut of the faction’s new theme music which is an upgrade from the old one. .

The action begins with a lockup and Tamina immediately utilizes her power advantage by pushing Fox backwards towards the corner. Fox then uses her speed advantage with a quick go behind and a waistlock; Tamina breaks free with a sharp back elbow. Tamina misses a corner charge and Fox scores a nearfall with a sunset flip out of the corner.

Fox rocks Tamina with forearm smashes to the jaw but lacks the power to execute an Irish Whip. Tamina shoots Fox into the ropes instead causing serious whiplash to the lower back. With Fox downed, she follows with a running knee to the side of the head. A second knee strike follows as does a headbutt. Tamina sends Fox into the ropes and connects with a wicked powerslam. But her pause to gloat only nets a 2 count.

Tamina lands another headbutt then flaunts her advantage by standing on Fox’s hair and neck. A chinlock maintains her advantage until Fox fights to her feet and fires off shots to the midsection. Her comeback is snuffed out with a thrust to the throat.

Fox stumbles into the corner and Tamina follows in with a running back elbow smash. With Fox slumped down on the canvas, she is left wide open for a running hip attack. Rather than cover, Tamina drags Fox by her hair and is surprised by a cradle for a nearfall. Fox rolls to her feet and catches Tamina with a pair of dropkicks. Tamina avoid a boot and launches Fox across the ring by her hair. Tamina attempts to catch Fox in the corner again but she moves and rolls Tamina up for the pinfall.

Winner: Alicia Fox

Post-Match: Fox isn’t even able to have her hand raised before Tamina jumps her from behind. Tamina administers a beating that leaves Fox down and out, giving her the proverbial last word in the battle.

Analysis: A decent female twist of the David vs. Goliath bout. Tamina is at her best when her strength is showcased while Fox did well as the underdog battling from underneath. With their respective factions hampered by injuries to key members, the best either can hope for is frequent appearances on shows like these for now. I wouldn’t mind seeing Tamina break away from Team B.A.D. and form an alliance with Nia Jax whenever she gets her main roster call up.

We are shown a recap of Raw’s main story: WWE World Heavyweight Champion Roman Reigns battling more odds thrown his way by the McMahons, his night ending with an F5 from the Royal Rumble’s deadliest entrant, Brock Lesnar.

3. Jack Swagger& Mark Henry vs. The Ascension (Konnor& Viktor)

As they did two weeks ago on Superstars, Viktor and Swagger kick off the action. Swagger takes an early advantage with a side headlock takeover, maintaining the hold as Viktor hits the mat. Viktor fights to his feet and sends Swagger into the ropes, Swagger coming off with a shoulder tackle. Swagger grips Viktor’s wrist and moves in to tag Henry but Viktor escapes, wanting no part of The World’s Strongest Man.

Viktor catches Swagger with a boot to the midsection after goading him into remaining the legal man. He applies a side headlock but Swagger powers into a reversal. Viktor sends him into the ropes and is again taken down by a shoulder tackle as Swagger come back at him. Viktor recovers and drives Swagger into his corner and tags in Konnor. Konnor’s offense is brief,a few stomps to the body, before Viktor tags back in.

Viktor lands a hard chop and an uppercut to stun The Real American. He sends Swagger into the ropes but Swagger ducks a clothesline and catches him going for a leapfrog. Swagger plants Viktor or with a modified Spinebuster and goes for The Patriot Lock. Viktor kicks him off but fortunately it’s in the direction of Henry who he tags in. Henry blocks a right hand and nails Viktor with a headbutt. He sends Viktor into his corner and punishes him with battering rams into the midsection.

Surprisingly Swagger tags back in to continue the battering ram based offense. Swagger takes Viktor to the mat with a sweet looking judo throw into an armbar. Viktor fights up and buries a knee to the midsection but his attempt to tag out is blocked and he’s drilled with a short arm clothesline. Swagger launches Viktor across the ring and sets up for the Swagger Bomb. Konnor pulls his partner to safety but gets decked off the apron the second he jumps back onto it. Swagger steps onto the apron, still distracted by Konnor, allowing Viktor to sweep him onto it back first.

After a commercial break, the action picks up with Viktor driving a knee into Swagger’s back then catching him with an uppercut. Viktor fires Swagger into his corner chest first. Konnor tags in and Ascension gets a nearfall with their trademark corner splash/leaping knee to the chest combination. Konnor comes off the ropes with a flying elbow for another nearfall. Swagger fights out of a chinlock and delivers knee strikes to the midsection. He goes for a sunset flip but Viktor makes the blind tag and kicks him from behind as he completes the move.

Viktor mockingly does a “We The People” taunt before hitting a leaping fiist drop for a nearfall. He then works Swagger over in the corner with well placed kicks. Konnor tags back in and alternates between back elbow smashes and uppercuts. Swagger has a burst of energy and begins clocking both Ascension with blows until Konnor takes him to the mat with a leg grapevine.

Viktor tags in and traps Swagger in a front facelock. Showing rugged determination, Swagger nearly makes it to Henry but Viktor lets go and lands a knee to the gut. Viktor comes off the ropes right into a belly to belly suplex. Henry and Konnor get tags and go at one another. Henry delivers several clotheslines then squashes Konnor in the corner. Henry hits a powerslam for good measure. Viktor re-inserts himself into the action and receives a powerslam as well. Henry calls on Swagger who obliges with a Swagger Bomb on Viktor.

Konnor attempts to blindside Henry who spins around in time and hits The World’s Strongest Slam for the pinfall.

Winners: Jack Swagger& Mark Henry

The show ends with the babyfaces celebrating as Ascension defiantly yell threats from the top of the ramp.

Analysis: This match followed the same formula as the previous encounter only longer. The action was solid enough featuring sound psychology throughout. As I’ve written before, The Ascension have really improved in recent months but creative gave up on them a long time ago making it quite the shame. Henry&Swagger once again made a pretty good pair though again it felt like they were thrown back together with a good portion of the crew in India. For Swagger,a tag team would be best since his singles career is stuck in neutral.

Final Thoughts:

Definitely a serviceable show this week. The three matches, while not off the charts, weren’t bad by any means. I really enjoyed the Lawler/Brennan commentary; King’s return to his heel roots is an excellent move and Rich played off him really well. If you have 42 minutes to kill,you could do worse than giving this a look.

I can be reached at on Twitter: @RandomStormGuy and Rainmaker5685@gmail.com if you have any thoughts of the show to share!