3/13 NXT Recap
March 13, 2014
LIVE! From Full Sail University
by Emerson “I love shrimp! Who else loves shrimp?” Witner
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Here’s what you need to know about NXT:
-The NXT Champion is Adrian Neville, who became champion during NXT Arrival on February 27, winning a Ladder Match against Bo Dallas, who had been champion for 260 days
-They also have Tag Team Champions, Konnor and Viktor, better known as The Ascension. They won the belts on October 3, defeating Adrian Neville and Corey Graves
-Paige is the first, and so far only, Woman’s Champion. She captured the belt on July 25 defeating Emma in the finals of a grueling tournament, which was not held in Rio De Janero.
-John “Bradshaw” Layfield is the Interim General Manager of the show, replacing Dusty Rhodes who Triple H fired in a power trip.
-The announce team is constantly rotating with some combination of Byron Saxton, William Regal, Brad Maddox, Alex Riley, Jason Albert (formerly Tensai), Renee Young and Tom Phillips
And that’s everything you need to know about NXT. (Now we know!) (And knowing is half the battle) (G.I. Joe!)
-Before we start, here is my weekly plug to check out both my Epic Tweets in Wrestling History over at WrestleCrap.com, as well as my horrible movie blog as my friend Lauren and I spend an entire month reviewing total crap at BadMovieMonth.tumblr.com
They start off by officially changing Tensai’s name to Jason Albert. At least they didn’t just ignore it and pretend he was always Jason Albert.
1.) NXT Woman’s Champion Paige submitted Sasha Banks (w/Charlotte and Summer Rae’s Head On A Stick)
The love of my life kicks off the action this week and Charlotte is the one with Summer Rae’s head on a stick. Alex Riley brags that it is a great thing that NXT wrestlers have their own merchandise. It has been a long time since he was on the Indy scene, huh?
Sasha gets the heat by slapping Paige’s back. Really.
This match was nothing to write home about. Sasha had some very long rest holds that were meant to give you a chance to count Paige’s ribs. Finally the champion fought back and got the submission win with the Scorpion Cross Lock.
-After the match Charlotte attacked Paige, which caused Natalya to run in for the save.
-Last week Corey Graves went 1-1, beating Yoshi Tatsu by countout and lost to Sami Zayn. Sami cut a post match promo and said the feud was over. I doubt that.
-Mojo Rawley is backstage talking to himself and walking around fast.
2.) NXT Tag Team Champions The Ascension beat Travis Tyler & Cal Bishop
The World Tag Team Champions Of The World Of The Other Side Of Orlando are here to do battle with tonight’s jobbers: Travis Tyler and Cal Bishop, who didn’t even get a ring introduction, much less an entrance. I wonder who will win.
Cal Bishop got 3 seconds of offense in, pushing the top rope into Viktor’s arm. But, in the shock to everyone in Orlando, Ascension picked up yet another victory with the Fall of Man.
Jason was asked what team in NXT could beat Ascension. There are no other teams in NXT.
3.) Mason Ryan pinned Wesley Blake
Renee Young joins the announce team. Normally she only does the diva matches, but Mason Ryan’s breasts are larger than Charlotte’s.
Wesley Blake wore a cowboy hat, which led to the 4 person announce team to ask what a fake cowboy is, if he is a real cowboy.
Mason wins his second match in a row, this time with a cobra clutch slam. This is the first time he has won two matches in a row in almost 9 months.
-Devin Taylor interviewed Bayley, who is watching Bret Hart matches on her iPad. Sasha and Charlotte walked up and made fun of her. Bayley’s response was to steal the Summer head and mock them.
Nattie walked up and talked about Bret Hart beating Ric Flair for the title.
4.) Alexander Rusev (w/Lana) submitted Xavier Woods
Prince Pretty comes out before the match and wants to wrestle Rusev instead, but Xavier laughed at him. During Rusev’s entrance, Breeze beat down Woods for whatever reason. Thankfully Rusev has a lengthy entrance, as by the time Rusev finished, Woods was back on his feet and ready to go.
Rusev threw Woods around until Xavier tried to do his best Chris Weidman impersonation by checking Rusev’s leg kick, but thankfully for Rusev, and unfortunately for Woods, his leg did not break, so Rusev hit a Samoan Drop and slapped on the Accolade for the tap.
-Sheamus is on NXT next week
-Adrian Neville vs Bo Dallas: The Rematch is in 2 weeks.
5.) Bo Dallas pinned Colin Cassidy
The realist guy in the room is here in the main event this week against the longest reigning NXT Champion of the last 25 years.
Colin gets a little more offense than usual, as without Enzo he has been doing a lot of jobbing. There really isn’t much to this match. The fans chant boring, so Bo turned it on them by saying this was Bo’s ring.
Colin got a near fall off of a big boot to the mush, but Bo picked up the win with a Double Arm DDT.
-That is it for this week. They are on a bit of a lull since Arrival, but can they turn things back around next week? Until then, I invite you to say your vitamins and take your prayers.