Bracing For Impact: New Year’s Wishes For TNA’s Top Stars

Dec 31, 2013 - by staff


New Year’s Resolutions are great, but they’re usually about what people want for themselves.  If you were to go through the TNA locker room and ask stars for their 2014 resolutions, you’d have a list that pretty much says “To Win The World Heavyweight Championship” over and over again.

New Year’s Wishes are different, though.  These are the good and bad things that we, the fans, hope our stars get in the next calendar year because – to put it bluntly – they all deserve it. As a fan of TNA Wrestling, here is what I wish for each superstar:

Magnus: The understanding of all he truly gave up in order to get the World Heavyweight Champion

Velvet Sky: A new boyfriend

Zema Ion: A mute button

Joseph Park: Inner Peace

Abyss: Outward violence to all who did his “brother” wrong

Bad Influence: A year-long Appletini hangover

James Storm: Beer. That’s it. Maybe a World Heavyweight Championship reign, but he’d be happy with just the beer.

Gunner: Decaf

Ken Anderson: A healthy year without any bullied visits for his wife & family

Ethan Carter III:  The feeling of having his shoulders down for three seconds in a TNA ring…repeatedly.

Bobby Roode: A joke or something that makes him crack smile, even just once.

Gail Kim: A strong challenger that will finally dethrone her of the Knockout’s Championship.

Lei’d Tapa: The realization that maybe she’s the one referenced in Gail Kim’s wish.

Bully Ray: A name tag so he can stop confirming that everyone in the building knows who he is.

Austin Aries: A tag team partner he can count on.

Samoa Joe: One major moment that will remind all his fans & critics that he’s a true main eventer.

Garrett Bischoff & Knux: New vests.

Sting: Respect from young stars that seem to forget that they’re standing with an icon.

Rockstar Spud: A suit that doesn’t make him look like a club-hopping Pee Wee Herman.

TNA President Dixie Carter: Success and prosperity for the company she loves so much, without the attitude that has angered so many of her top stars.

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