Review: WWE Films “Knucklehead”
Oct 22, 2010 - by staff
If you take your kids to this, you deserve the inevitable fist to nuts.
A distinctly shameless and shoddily made family comedy, this WWE production for wrestler Big Show (Wight) turns an already saccharine plot into a toxic, fart-laden piledriver. Our hero is gentle-giant Walter (“I guess Iâ€™m just a knucklehead!”), a 35-year-old who still lives at the orphanage where he was reared. After accidentally burning down the kitchen and putting his home in financial jeopardy, Walter is literally thrownâ€”by a nun through a stained-glass windowâ€”into the life of hustler Eddie (Feuerstein). Running from his gambling debts, Eddieâ€™s praying for a new fighter to manage. Prayers answered?
Alas, no: The movie doesnâ€™t magically end there, with a refund of your money. A mere plot summary canâ€™t begin to approximate the way youâ€™ll feel manhandled by a stridently wacky orchestral score (more syrup for your pancakes?) and story elements seemingly selected by a brain-dead Hulkamaniac. Is it fair to include both an unattached blond teacher and a cute orphan with abandonment issues? Wight himself is a benign, dopey presence; you donâ€™t mind him. But itâ€™s a mistake for the big lug to shoot so broadly for the middle. It takes a special kind of failure to make Dwayne “The Rock” Johnsonâ€™s efforts look like models of sparkling wit and unpredictability.â€”Joshua Rothkopf